Sex plays an important role in many relationships, but it can also be a source of stress, anxiety and arguments. If a relationship is experiencing difficulties, sex and intimacy are often the first things to suffer, so how can you overcome stress as a couple and tackle problems related to sex?
Possible issues that can cause stress in a relationship include anxiety about sexual performance, differences in libido and sexual preferences and problems relating to previous sexual experiences. Reduced libido and lack of sex can leave people feeling alienated, alone and even resentful toward their partners. Here are some tips to help you deal with stress related to sex.
How To Deal With Stress Related To Sex
1. Be Honest With Each Other
Honesty is always the best policy, so the saying goes and in many cases, this is right, especially when it comes to relationships. If you’re anxious about having sex for the first time, you are worried that sex is not going well with your partner or you are having troubles with decreased libido, talk to your partner. Often, sharing problems makes them seem much more manageable and you can work things out together; it may be that your partner has the same concerns as you and being open with each other will benefit both of you. If your partner seems closed off from you, give them space and time to reach out to you when they are ready.
2. Get Help
If sex is an issue, there’s no shame in seeking help. If you suffer from erectile dysfunction, your sex drive has diminished or you simply have reservations about having sex or trying new things in the bedroom, there is help available. Doctors can help with erectile dysfunction, a problem, which affects many men and there are therapies and techniques, which can be used to promote intimacy and boost libido. It’s typically men who struggle to talk about their feelings relating to sex believing the problems will go away, but men should realize that health problems happen to everyone and that these problems can manifest themselves in other forms when left untreated.
3. Go Easy On Yourself
Films and television shows create images of perfect relationships with amazingly handsome men and beautiful women who have amazing sex; however, in reality, life is often not like this and you will probably feel much better if you don’t put yourself under too much pressure. Sex is different in every relationship and just because you aren’t doing it all the time, doesn’t mean there are issues in your relationship or problems with your performance. One factor attributed to men suffering from lack of libido is that they tend to focus on the negative factors of not getting an erection instead of focusing the mind on sexual thoughts. Other factors involved can involve not wanting to get a partner pregnant or for fear of transmitting sexual disease to your lover.
Exercise is a great way of tackling stress, but it also helps to boost confidence, increase stamina and make you feel better about yourself, which is key to the enjoyment of sexual relationships. Whether you love to hit the gym or you prefer outdoor activities, exercise provides a host of benefits for body and mind. Studies point to women who exercise having higher rates of sex drive, along with less painful episodes of PMS. Energy levels are also something to consider when it comes to managing your libido. A poor diet is often linked with a lack of energy, so it’s important to keep an eye on the type of food which enters your body. It’s always good to sip water and keep hydrated throughout the day as this is a great way of ridding yourself of unwanted toxins which can hold you back.
5. Use Sex To Reduce Stress
Research has shown that sex is actually a really effective stress buster, so try to use it in a positive way, rather than getting bogged down in the details of how often and how you do it. Enjoy sex and intimacy, spend time together and have fun. There are no rules for sex in a relationship and you should never feel under pressure to fit in with stereotypes or survey results. If you relax, you will probably find it much more enjoyable.
Stress can come in a variety of forms and for many reasons and its affect can be wide reaching on your overall health. The affects of a stressful life which is left unchecked can lead to underlying health issues, this is a problem as many people do not recognize the signs of stress until they arise in other forms. If you believe things are getting too much for you regarding sex and believe it’s affecting your relationship, seek advice and speak to a sexual health professional.
Photo: Petras Gagilas